Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
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