How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he shaved USA in his pubs
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
