This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
