he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize