Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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