You're completely useless in the revolution.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
