He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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