absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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