the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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