Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
