I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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