Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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