Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
