Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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