i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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