HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
