I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
