get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
