So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
