I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
ugly people sure do ruin things
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
