I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
and i looked up. we had an audience...
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I'm at about main and main street
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
