mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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