i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
a search helicopter?!
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize