i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize
