You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
