well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
