its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
