my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Farmville is her only friend.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
