i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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