I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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