that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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