so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
