it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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