he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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