Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
She told me I should be a condom model.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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