he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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