Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I wish I only lived at night.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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