Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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