Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
