So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
