porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
