Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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