I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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