the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
