someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
