Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
