i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
