As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
