check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
