Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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