you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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